With Lizzie, I am constantly second and third and fourth guessing myself. It is a never ending battle in my mind between teaching her how to behave and how not to behave while trying not to cross her discipline line and catapult her right back to the first 2 years of her life.
We have never spanked but the step is well used in our house - especially - with - these - two - girls!!!!
Lizzie, however, freaks when she is in trouble and will go to a place within herself that is difficult for us to reach. She seems to alternate between being afraid that she is in trouble to completely loosing all control and having a meltdown or tantrum. I still don't know the difference in the two. Is there a difference? I don't suppose it matters - neither one is pleasant.
Em on the other hand is constantly testing boundaries and has been a bit
Maybe Em is picking up on the stress around here of late? I don't know. This is one of the reasons I choose to home school her. Maybe she needs more one on one time - don't know?? What I do know is that I am tired and all out of resources. I am finding that I haven't much to pull from when things get rough around here. Hubby has been working a lot and gone a lot and yet our financial situation remains the same - not good!
Introduce the beginning of another school year (really - already ?), my scary plunge into the world of home schooling, the oldest starting a new school and not being happy about it and Lizzie not understanding why
Em gets to stay home with Mommie while she has to go to school every morning, on top of everything else and there you have the perfect storm and storm it did tonight.
Tonight was hard and I had nothing, nada, zilch, zero. I was done. After a summer of sisterly battles, we have now added bedtime battles and I just had nothing! So tonight, I just sat down in their room and sobbed. Nice, huh??? My sweet Charlie happen to walk in about that time and despite my best efforts to hide the tears, he understood and promptly took action, offering to sleep with Lizzie while Caleb slept with Em because you see, while they fight a good fight these days, they do not like to be separated. They do not like to be alone and I had separated them which caused them to join me in my sobfest! Pretty picture, huh??
Now, I sit here feeling utterly drained and so totally like a bad momma. These are the days that I just want a "do over." Of course that "do over" would have to be accompanied by an extra supply of patience and maybe a nice long bubble bath for me with a glass of wine and an Eagles CD, followed by a nap!!! Sorry, got off track there for a minute! Hehe!!
Anyway, you get the picture. There has been a whole lotta "real life" around here lately and I am tired and low on time, time to blog or to answer emails or to keep up with my precious waiting kids. I know I have mentioned this here lately, but I ask for patience as I get my ducks in a row, figure out how to handle this latest batch of "real life" and get my home schooling groove on!! I might not be posting as much right now but please keep checking back as I know I won't be able to stay silent for too long!!! Hehe!!
Oh and if anyone has any suggestions for dealing with two - very - strong willed - hard headed - 4 year old girls, PLEASE feel free to share! The sanity you save could be MINE!!!! Heh!!
