Wednesday, January 29, 2014

Happy Birthday Charlie!

For 14 years, you have been making your Momma smile...


and gasp...


but mostly just smile!


You take life as it comes but are determined to live every single moment to the fullest!


Your "glass" is always half full...


and your heart always is full to overflowing!


Your infectious smile just draws people in...


and it sure with your sister, Lucy!


That thrilling stroller ride through the airport right after you met was all it took!


She was hooked!


Your brother Caleb is your biggest fan...


so much so that he used his beloved pizza gift card to buy you a pizza for your birthday!


If you know Caleb, you know what a gift from the tummy heart that was!


Yep, you have an effect on those who know you my dear!


You are funny and smart and cute and have a smile that reeks of mischievousness.


My sweet Charlie, you are a rascal...


a rascal with a heart and I love you!

Happy Birthday wonderful Charlie!


I have a ton few more grey hairs since you have been on this earth...


and a whole lot more JOY!

Wednesday, January 15, 2014

Lucy's New Wheels!

She knew it was coming...


and she was SO excited about it!
 
 
Not that Lucy needs a walker all the time as she has made such great progress in the short amount of time that she has been home...
 
about a month after coming home

 
and about a month and a half ago


but there are times...  
 
times when those little legs of hers just don't want to move anymore or times when she just cannot seem to stay on her feet and when Lucy falls, it is not an easy fall...
 
there is usually blood involved - poor baby - and as soon as Lucy started school last week, it became very apparent that she needed just a little help.
 
Soooo, 5 or 6 falls and one nasty cut on the head later...


my sweet girl has a new set of wheels!


A beautiful friend of mine saw my post on FB, looking for a used set of wheels for Lucy, called me immediately and insisted that we allow her to buy Lucy a walker!
 
She would not take "no" for an answer!

She researched, told me how to measure, talked to the company's customer service and by the next day it was ordered!

Lord, thank you for my sweet friend, her heart for You and her passion to serve You!

So with no further adieu, here is a very short video of Lucy's first day at school with her brand new wheels.
 
 
Watch out Caleb, Em and Lizzie...

"chase" with Lucy has just gotten serious...

or at least - FAIR!

Game on!
 

Thursday, January 9, 2014

A Day of Firsts

So if you saw my previous post, Licensed and Legal, you know that our oldest now has his (gulp) restricted drivers license so for the first time ever, on Tuesday...
 
 
 I watched as he drove away...
 
 
 without me...
 
 
in my Daddy's old pick up truck!
 
 
I know my Dad is smiling down on his first grandchild and somehow making sure that Christian will always have a full tank of gas and a little bit of cash - just in case!


Something that he always made sure his little girl (that would be me) had.
 
 
Miss you in times like this Dad.


The other "first" that happened on Tuesday was Maggie and Lucy's very first day of real school!


They were so very excited...


and that made it so much easier on this momma's heart.


They are growing and changing so rapidly right before my eyes...


and while I know how wonderful they are, as their Momma, I worry about how others (esp other children) will perceive (and treat) them and sending them off to real school, knowing that they would be mainstreamed for lunch and recess...


well, let's just say that my heart just could not go there as I said goodbye and left them there, so excited and eager to experience what their siblings mostly take for granted...


however, as I got them settled in their class this morning, their teacher began to tell me about their first lunch in the cafeteria with all the other children.


She told me that Maggie and Lucy had really had such a good time and that the other children who were asked to sit with them, were very interested in the girls and that they were asking a lot of questions but being very sweet and polite and that because those kiddos had had such a great time sitting with my girls...

 there were many other kids who were asking to be able to sit with them tomorrow!
 
SOAR

While we still have our daily challenges, these are the ways in which the Lord just blesses us and reassures us that He has this and that He is in the hard as well as the good.

These are glimpses of what He has planned for Maggie and Lucy...

and for us!

As we left school that day - the day of the great lunch - a sweet little girl came over and said goodbye and that she would "see them tomorrow"!

When I asked Maggie and Lucy who she was and where they had met her, all they said was...

LUNCH

Yep, the Lord has a plan for my sweet girls and from what I can tell it reaches far wider than our little family.

So, tomorrow I will send them off yet again with book bags and lunch boxes and the knowledge that while they are not with me for those 7 hours, they are with Him...
 
 
and He is always with them...

even in a school cafeteria!

Tuesday, January 7, 2014

Licensed and Legal!!!

and I am still in shock!

My baby boy...


my first born...
 

is licensed and legal...


to drive...


without us!

Yikes!

I am so very proud of this amazing young man but good grief where did the time go!


I mean the next time I turn around, I will be making one less lunch, setting one less place at the table, buying much less milk but wanting the time (our time) back!

Funny how raising teenagers and watching as they grow more and more independent, makes you yearn just a bit for your own childhood and your time of innocence and how that yearning breaks your heart just a bit more for your kids, knowing what they are leaving behind and what they are walking into.
 
This is a big step toward that independence for our oldest and I am thrilled and terrified for him all at the same time.
 
So if you think about it, please say a prayer for this Momma's heart as there will be a little catch in my throat every time I watch him drive away, a breath or two skipped when he is late getting back and a big sigh of relieve and prayer of thanks every time he walks back through that front door!
 
Parenthood...
 
What a ride!
 
*wink* 

Saturday, January 4, 2014

A Must Read!

A very sweet friend sent this to me the other day and y'all...
 
 it hit home...

it brought hubby to his knees...

and it is one of the best pictures of adoption I have ever read!

I wanted to share this with you.

We are in the thick of this right now with really good moments and some not so good moments but the bad moments are fewer than the good and this was so encouraging to us!

I hope it will be for you too!

10 Things You Wish You Knew About Older Child Adoption: By Selena Bergey

1.  You will fall in love with a picture and a child a world away, and you will lay awake at night, thinking of this child and wondering about the days, months, years that you have missed. You’ll wonder if you will ever truly be “Mommy” and if your love will fill the void of an empty heart. An ache will fill you down deep in your soul and it will become your necessary strength for this journey.  
 
2.  You will try to share this crazy, incredible adoption experience with your closest friends and loved ones and find their blank stares and “Are you completely crazy?” comments unnerving. They won’t get it, and that’s okay, because you know in your soul that you are this child’s mother and you will give up trying to explain it to everyone.
 
3.  Your “Gotcha Day” might not be filled with cute pictures you can’t wait to post on the internet of you and your new child. In fact, the hand-over will be quick, the paperwork a blur, the guide will pat your back and say, “See you tomorrow!” and you will find yourself in a quiet hotel room, alone, with a child whom you loved from afar but cannot even begin to communicate with. The newness and shock will wear off within a day or two and then reality will set in, for both you AND your child, and your world will start spinning with thoughts of “what have we done?” and “can we DO this?” and their world will be spinning with thoughts of “I’m scared!” and “I want to go back to the orphanage!” and even if you know this is for the very best you will both be struggling under the weight of the UNKNOWN yet to come. You will lie awake at night with a stranger in the room and hope you haven’t just made the biggest mistake of your life. You will long for your other children, for home, for sights, smells, and sounds that are familiar—knowing all the while your child is losing exactly what you miss.

4.  You will get home and things will settle down a bit. You still can’t communicate much, but charades and Google Translate and baby talk will work for a while. The jet lag will just about kill you, but once that wears off, the honeymoon will begin. Your husband and other children, your friends, and your family will lavish attention on the new child, and you will breathe a sigh of relief. This may actually work after all! The smiles, the giggles, the joyful, abandoned way your child embraces new experiences will delight you and encourage you. You will stress over schoolwork and foods for awhile, then shortly come to the realization that there are far more important things to be learned.
 
5.  You will be shocked by this child’s immaturity. No matter how old their paperwork says they are, in reality they are more like a toddler. So you have to start with toddler basics—things like: sit quietly at the table, don’t wipe your snot on your shirt, don’t throw yourself on the floor when I tell you “no”. And you will begin the long process of repeating yourself, daily. Some new behaviors will be learned quickly—but other ones will take every.last.drop. of energy you ever possessed. You will have to teach your child how to snuggle, how to seek comfort, how to need people, how to read their body signals, how to do just about every last thing. You will cease to stress over schoolwork and such and will learn to appreciate little victories—like the first time you take your child to the store and they don’t crawl under the clothing racks or run around in loud circles. Or the first time they fall and get hurt and run TO you instead of AWAY from you. You’ll capture the first unsolicited kiss or hug and the first “I love you” and keep the memory and sweetness of it tucked away for the next exhausting day.
 
6.  The honeymoon will eventually wear off completely, and your child will begin to grieve and rage heavily. The immensity of the loss (“Why my China mommy not keep me? Why you not adopt me when I a baby??? Why I not see my friends in China anymore?”) combined with the inability to process their feelings in a healthy way—and the language barrier—will send the child almost completely over the edge. The mourning process may be quick but it may be lengthy and you will be dealing with hours and hours of crying, screaming, raging, defiance, or running away. This child who never learned to obey will defy you at every turn. You will need to help this child all.day.long. yet will feel the guilt of not being able to meet the needs of everyone who needs you simultaneously. The new child “needs” the most so the other family members must take second place for a time. And your guilt continues. You will, out of complete necessity, pull back from EVERYTHING else in your life.
 
7.  You will keep the “bad days” to yourself, far more than you should, simply because you want this to work and you know you’re right smack in the center of God’s will and you don’t want to hear the “I told you so’s” from the crowd of dissenters. You will fear scaring off potential adoptive families if you tell the truth about how very hard this is. You will find your entire world is turned upside down for a while, and you will wonder if life will ever return to normal. The house you used to keep spotless will become messy, the children you used to have well-trained will begin to struggle, and you will find every aspect of your life in fragile disarray.
 
8.  Your other children will “love” this child, then hate this child, then learn to truly love this child. This process will rip your entire heart right out of your body, yet it will teach all of you about Jesus’ love. You will turn into a full-time counselor, guiding precious little hearts towards choosing love and forgiveness. YOU can take just about anything, but when your other children come to you and express their honest thoughts and struggles over this new child, you will come very close to wanting to disrupt, to start over, to go back to the safety of your “old” comfort circle. You will need other adoptive friends who can encourage and equip you to carry on when the going gets tough.
 
9.  You will choose to continue on this journey, not because it is easy, but because it is good and right and necessary for healing. You will hold the raging child for hours and hours, you will redo and script and discipline and train and repeat yourself until you think you’re going to lose your mind. You will snuggle this child when it makes your skin crawl, you will love this child even though you don’t even like them some days, you will drop into bed drop-dead exhausted—and then you will get up again the next day and do it all over again, because you are committed to helping this child blossom. You will not rely on your feelings, because they will be all over the stinkin’ place at times, but you WILL rely on your husband, your faith, and your unwavering commitment to parent this precious child. You will dig down deep and plow ahead, KNOWING the rewards will be worth it.
 
10.  You will wake up one morning and realize that you’ve both made it through the dark valley and you’re finally on somewhat even ground. Your child will brush their teeth without being told, will use a napkin and manners at the table. They will not whine, cry, quit, or cheat at their schoolwork. They will seek out affection and receive it willingly. You will smile as your children play together nicely and whisper sweet secrets in the dark at bedtime. You will listen and weep as your child finally opens up about their past, the abuse, and the heart of why they are who they are. You will take a breath and realize that you no longer love the image of this child–you truly love them. And you will find that your child is not the only one who has grown during this journey—you will not be the same person as before. You will be better. You will have no regrets as you realize you would gladly do it all over again to get to TODAY.   
 
You can read more from Selena here at The Bergey Bunch