I don't know what her soccer future holds but I do know that the Lord has transformed her hopelessness into hope and that hope is healing our sweet girl from the inside out.
The 6th one is just happy to come along for the ride and enjoy the games, as she just has fun where ever she goes!
Yep, soccer consumes us about 8 months out of the year and while I have my moments of complaint...
notice the rain..
I have many more moments of fun...
of laughter...
of pride...
of bonding...
and of inspiration...
awe inspiring moments of reflection...
and thankfulness...
Soccer has been a vehicle through which the Lord has used to bond us together...
and one through which He has used and is using to heal...
certain ones of us.
We don't ever take it too seriously...
but we do seriously love the way in which it has been used to grow us individually and as a family.
Yes, it has been a long season and yes I am glad to have a break...
and yes, by February, I will be rested and ready for soccer 2016.
It will be Christian's senior and final high school soccer season.
He played his last club soccer game this season...
and I am struck by the length of each season...
and the brevity of such a multitude of seasons...
and I just want time to stand still...
except when I don't...
and there in lies the secret...
the longing for tomorrow...
while cherishing the past...
and learning to enjoy the moment...
cause it goes by too fast and in the midst of the complaints...
there are memories being made...
and I will remember that in the rain and the heat and the cold and the bugs...
except when I don't
*grin*
But, beloved, do not forget this one thing, that with the Lord one day is as a thousand years, and a thousand years as one day. 2 Peter 3:8
Lord, thank you for memories and the moments and the days and the years...
made it to Thanksgiving at in-laws with beautifully decorated table...
sweet Mom-in-law sick...
got a few good shots of the boys Christian - ugh - Charlie - typical - hehe...
minus Caleb as he was sick...
got some really cute shots of the girls and their cousins...
just hours before Em revisited her Thanksgiving meal, over and over and over again...
all night long.
poor baby.
Despite all of this however...
I am so thankful to have been able to spend this time, sickness and all, with my sweet family cause ya see...
even though we had car trouble...
my amazing Hubby was able to trouble shoot, we both prayed, He answered and when we were on our way again...
Hubby and I just smiled, held hands and thanked Him...
and even though my sweet Mom-in-law was sick and yes, still managed to create that gorgeous table...
it allowed my awesome Sis-in-law and myself a wonderful opportunity to enjoy some rare time together (minus kids) to cook the Thanksgiving meal - even the turkey - which for this vegetarian was a labor of love y'all - let me tell ya...
*grin*
and even though my Caleb was sick...
he was wanting some Momma time and hugging on me all night long...
and even though Em probably never wants to eat turkey again...
sweet girl rallied by Friday, somehow managed to get no one else sick and was ready to face the loooong drive home!
So despite all the set backs, I am thankful...
I am thankful for a sweet Mom-in-law who always makes theses times so very festive and who despite sickness, was willing to dig out the turkey innards, neck and all!
Did I mention the vegetarian thing... Bleh!!!
I am also thankful for turkey roasters, complete with instructions, and a sweet Sis-in-law who makes everything fun.
I am thankful for the flu shot (hehe) and an almost 13 teen year old who still wants Momma when he is sick.
and I am thankful for stain resistant carpet and an amazing 9 year old who can be down one minute and so up the next.
give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you.
1 Thessalonians 5:18
So this Thanksgiving, I am giving thanks in all circumstances...
and I am most thankful for an incredible Hubby who is choosing to be thankful too!
Orphan Sunday was two Sundays ago and we were in the midst of trying to cram in all of the soccer games that have been rained out this season...
however, for me...
Orphan Sunday is so much more than one Sunday a year...
it is every Sunday and every Monday, every Tuesday, every Wednesday, every Thursday, every Friday and every Saturday.
There are not many moments in my days that I don't think about, work for, pray for or grieve over orphans.
How could I not?
I look into the beautiful faces of my three Chinese daughters and am reminded that they were once orphans...
I hear the stories, their stories, their heartbreaking stories.
I live the effects of their stories on a daily basis and it - wrecks - me.
How can your heart not be shattered when you hear your precious daughter tell you that she was never hugged, never kissed goodnight, never allowed to play outside and never comforted when she called out in fear or distress.
How can your heart not be shattered when you see first hand the 18 metal cribs full of crying and eerily quiet babies and the one nanny in charge of them all and the reality of the first two years of your daughter's life comes crashing down all around you.
How can your heart not be shattered when you recall the smiles and the time and the attention and the love that you poured into your biological children as you begin to understand (in the depths of your spirit understand) the loss your precious, adopted daughters have suffered.
How can your heart not be shattered when you finally grasp that true spirit understanding that this is not just the tragic one time loss of a biological family but more fully, the loss of trust, the loss of security, the loss of worth, the loss of belonging, the loss of joy, the loss of hope and the loss of love...
this is the loss that gets tucked away in the heart.
This is the orphan's loss.
MY daughters were once orphans y'all.
That heart breaking fact is never, ever far from my heart...
as well as the fact that had we not said "yes Lord"...
we would have missed out on this...
and this...
and this...
this Divine transformation, this beauty from ashes, just serves to further burden my heart for the millions, yes millions of other orphans just waiting for their forever families to say...
Yes Lord!
Now I know not everyone feels called to adopt and I get that, however, please know that you are being called.
There are lots of different Bible translations that help us to understand and to study God's word, yet the Lord's mandate to care for the fatherless is very clear and needs no further "study guide"...
Pure and undefiled religion before God and the Father is this: to visit orphans and widows in their trouble, and to keep oneself unspotted from the world. James 1:27
"unspotted from the world"
I know this...
in the deepest parts of my heart I know this but I could not recognize it for most of my life.
I wanted neat and tidy.
I wanted safe and secure.
I wanted...
After all, I was a "good person".
I did all the things this world lays out for a "good person" to do...
but I had no clue...
I had yet to acknowledge the burden that had been placed on my heart, the burden that had weighed me down for most of my life, the burden that finally set me free.
I would never have believed, even 10 years ago, that we would have 7 precious children, that I would travel to China not once but twice, that we would be parenting three very special children and that part of my purpose in this life was to care for the fatherless...
yet here I am...
not "saving" but saved...
and all because the Lord never stopped calling me and because I finally decided to answer.
That burden on my heart that had lain dormant and just out of reach was suddenly exposed...
and in the summer of 2008, when our precious Lizzie came home...
everything changed...
we changed.
We now have hope beyond what this world offers.
We now have peace when this world lets us down.
We now have trust when circumstances are out of our control...
We now have Jesus...
all because, through one very special little girl, half a world away, He shook us to our very core and helped us to see this world through His eyes...
through His broken heart.
So bear with me here...
Did you know that (according to statistics)...
There are approximately 145 million children worldwide have lost either one or both parents.
Approximately 40 to 50 million of those children are "adoptable or would be best cared for through adoption. Ideally that means adoption locally/indigenously first and then adoption internationally."(According to The Abba Fund Blog)
Every 2.2 seconds another child ages out with no family to support them.
Every day, 38,493 children age out.
These statistics are heart breaking and seem daunting, yet, if only...
If only... "6% to 7% of the born again Christians in the world adopted we could care for all the adoptable orphans in the world" (According to The Abba Fund Blog).
So please, if you feel the burden...
if you feel His voice calling you...
whether that call includes adopting a child or fostering a child or child care sponsorship or grants for waiting children or funding/supporting adoptive families or mission works or or or...
There are so many good programs out there; programs designed to help those precious ones who need medical treatment or better educated care; programs designed to help families hold on to their beautiful children and programs designed to help those who have aged out or who are sadly considered "unadoptable".
Just please step outside of yourself, outside of the worldly expectations of a neat and tidy life...
outside of the tangible trappings of this fallen world...
outside of all of the "things" that our society tells us we "need".
and answer that call...
cause there are millions of children who just "need" YOU!
Imagine this... the amount of money that many people spend per month on fast food could be spent to provide for a child to be removed from an institution into a loving healing home, a place where they have attention, where they have hope, where they have love and where they have life!
Imagine this... the amount of money that many people spend at St*rbucks each month could be spent providing medical care, education or vocational training for a child who has already aged out.
I remember when we celebrated your very first birthday.
You were sick with an upset tummy and a fever...
which I was to learn over the years, was just the way you did sick!
I remember when you needed me to rock you to sleep every single night and I remember holding that moment close one night as I tried to commit it to memory.
I remember that night so clearly, holding you and rocking you as I felt the years slipping away from me even then.
It had been the third time that night that you had called for me, but I was determined to soak up every single second.
It was a sweet time when all that you needed to chase your fears away was me...
oh and Bo and Ginger and Blankie and Paci...
but you get my drift!
*grin*
It was a time before school and peer pressure and soccer and part time jobs and (gulp) driving!
It was a time that I knew I would never get back...
not with you anyway.
*wink*
I remember the joy and the laughter and the tears, the skinned knees battle scars, the bruised feelings and the snuggles.
I remember the fleeting moments we had together, just the two of us and I remember the pride of watching you become a big brother, over...
and over...
and over...
and over...
and over...
again....
and while you sometimes like to complain about that...
I have watched as your heart has grown as our family has and I have marveled at the way in which you have handled our need for more independence and responsibility from you.
I have come to trust your strength and I depend on you.
I remember mourning every year that went by while looking forward to the years that were to come and enjoying the little person that you were growing into...
and now that little person is...
18 years old!
Time is a funny thing.
As I call up all of those heart memories, all of those moments that passed between us and around us...
it seems enough to fill 100 years and at the same time...
not nearly enough for you to 18 years old.
Christian, the Lord has grown you into an incredible young man who knows his own heart and who is getting to know His heart.
You are strong inside and out and you hold those you love to the same high standards from which you navigate your own life.
As I look to the future, your future...
I am filled with a longing to hang on tightly to these present moments that are quickly slipping through my fingers as they propel you toward college and that transition into adulthood...
but all the while, I know you are ready and I know the time has come...
that time that seemed so close and yet so far away that one night 16 years ago when all you needed was your stuffed animals, your blankie, your paci and me...
the time to hold you in my heart as I trust the path that He has laid out before you.
This mothering thing is hard so bear with me as we explore this next uncharted territory together...
this territory of releasing my heart to the Lord, remaining as you stumble and marveling as you recover and discover His way for you.
And the Lord will guide you continually and satisfy your desire in scorched places and make your bones strong; and you shall be like a watered garden, like a spring of water, whose waters do not fail. Isaiah 58:11
In those scorched places of adulthood, He will be there. Turn to Him to quench your thirst and you will grow and thrive and help to "water" others.
We are just so proud of you and all that you are striving for. Your determination, courage, compassion and strength will be the vehicle through which the Lord will use you.
